Here is an example of a couple discussing a gift for a party. Watch how their different Money Personalities affect how they want to handle that situation.
Let’s take Suzie, for example. She is a Saver/Security seeker. Does she LOVE to give? Not really. Does it come “naturally” to give? NO. Does she think of the least expensive way to give a gift? YES. Does she put tons of time into the meaning of her gift? Not usually.
Suzie is married to Stephan. Stephan is a Flyer/ Spender. His Flyer Money Personality always thinks of relationships FIRST. So gifts are great if they make someone else happy. Then his secondary Spender Money Personality is super excited to go find that perfect gift. Does he “naturally” like to give? You bet! Does he care how expensive a gift is? NO. Does he put tons of time into the meaning of the gift? Absolutely.
Suzie and Stephan are invited to a big 10 year anniversary surprise party for their close friends Anna and Colby:
Stephen – “What gift do you want to take to Anna and Colby’s party?”
Suzie – “Gift? Why do we need to bring a gift?”
Stephan – “Suzie, are you kidding me? It’s a party?”
Suzie – “Really? Well, OK. I have a coupon to bed bath and beyond.”
Stephan – “Bed bath and beyond? Really? A practical gift? No way – I want to get them something fun like a bottle of wine and a gift certificate to the new steakhouse.”
Suzie – “Are you kidding me?! Do you know how much both of those costs?”
Stephan – “Suzie – they are are friends. Celebrating 10 years together! For crying out loud and we can afford it.”
Suzie – “It doesn’t matter. That is way too extravagant!”
Stephan goes and buys the buys the best bottle of wine he can find AND gets the steakhouse gift certificate. They walk into the party, in no mood to party.
Can you relate? Do you have opposite Money Personalities in YOUR relationship? Spender, Risk Taker or Flyers definitely bump up against Savers and Security Seekers.
Do you get anxious about gift giving or what your spouse is going to spend on the holidays? Did you think there was something wrong with you or your spouse?
Gift giving can actually be painful for some, but understand that there may be a reason why you aren’t as stressed as you Saver or Security Seeker friends. Or you are totally stressed. Let us know if you can relate – we love to see comments below :-).