Lots of people set personal goals for the New Year, but how about setting some goals as a couple this year? How about taking your goals to the next “dimension”, making them 3D?
It is important to start the New Year — communicating together. It’s a great time to feel inspired and set some goals, BUT instead of just the same old boring goals to eat better and save some money – blah, blah, blah – why not try a new dimension with our “3D” Goals? Dream, Date, Digital
Start this year off dreaming together about your future.
You work hard every day so make sure your hard work pays off. Dream some exciting dreams together. Dreams don’t sound like “let’s pay our bills” dreams are inspiring and fun!
Do you want to:
• Start a new hobby?
• Buy a bigger house?
• Retire early?
• Face a fear, i.e. skydiving, public speaking, white water rafting?
• Write a song or a book?
• Run a marathon?
• Learn to dance?
Dream and share some goals you’d like to shoot for. It doesn’t cost money to dream. Really dig into where you’d like to be in 5 years. The kids won’t always be this age AND they won’t always be at home.
Our boys are 14 and 16 and their lives are so much busier now than ever before. This last year we noticed we have more time together as a couple than we’ve had in over a decade. They are off enjoying their friends, their part-time jobs, their sports and other activities, which we love to see.
When they were younger we were in that “survival” mode, it’s just where you are when they’re little, so we get that, but husbands and wives can’t forget that our kids will grow up and leave home. That’s the plan. That’s the hope.
So we want to make sure we are investing in our relationship during those “survival” years so we truly enjoy each other once they’re off living their lives outside of our home.
Invest in each other by dreaming together for a fun future. Dream for this year. Dream for five years from now. Dream about retirement – together.
Let’s make 2018 The Year of Great Relationships.
Plan for a regular date night this year. We vote for once a week. BUT if that seems like too much, how about you pick the date you met or got married and set aside that date, i.e. the 12th, every month to do something just the two of you. Even if that’s just grabbing coffee or sitting at the bookstore thumbing through magazines and books and talking about what you find.
Set a date and then protect it.
Your relationship needs quantity time as much as quality time. You probably already attend a weekly meeting that is less important than your marriage so maybe once a week date night isn’t such a crazy notion. We even had weekly date nights when Bethany was so sick with cancer.
The date doesn’t have to be a huge, elaborate, expensive thing and last hours and hours. Sometimes, for us, it’s a Sunday from 3:00-5:00 p.m. while kids are studying or you could carve out an hour while the baby is asleep to connect with each other.
It’s also nice to put it in the budget to have one or two “nicer” outings during the year. A special time together to look forward to.
Last year a study in the U.K. found that couples who have a regular date night are 14% less likely to split up.
We think that number should be higher, but it does scientifically support the notion that investment of time pays off for your relationship.
The third “D” in your 3D goals is “Digital”. How can you use technology to keep you connected as a couple this year?
Would you feel more connected if you texted more often? Or texted less often, but put more thought into what you say? Use texting to connect. You could also share your calendars. Knowing what the other is doing keeps you engaged in their interests and protects your relationship.
How about a digital app to share access to your finances? You don’t have to combine accounts to share information about those accounts. Honeyfi and Better Haves are both great apps to share visibility to your finances with your partner.
Keeping resolutions or goals for the year isn’t easy. Setting goals as a couple, as a team, increases your odds of meeting those goals since you’re running towards the finish line together. Every race is easier when you run it with a friend.
Try taking your goals to a new dimension this year and make them 3D: Dream, Date, and Digital.
Make it happen!
Scott & Bethany Palmer
The Money Couple
We would love to hear about your New Year’s or anytime-of-year goals, leave us a comment below. For encouragement on making your relationship healthy and wealthy, follow us on twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest.